"I've got a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it."

A plot synopsis for a Marx Brothers movie is slightly unnecessary but here goes. The country of Freedonia is in financial turmoil and so desperate for the twenty million dollar donation from Gloria Teasdale that they accept her demand to instate Rufus T. Firefly as it's new President. The neighbouring country of Sylvania spies on Freedonia's new President and very soon war is unavoidable. Mainly because Firefly has already paid out for a month's rent on the battlefield...

"You're a brave man. Go and break through the lines. And remember, while you're out there risking your life and limb through shot and shell, we'll be in be in here thinking what a sucker you are."


skyjude review
An unrelenting attack on the funny bone with the most surreal of movies presenting some of the finest slapstick and one-liners in movie history. It really is quite astonishing how this movie contains the wittiest one-liners as well as most inspired physical comedy ever seen on celluloid. It's perhaps likely that modern day comedians don't even attempt this style of movie making as they know perfection has already been achieved. If you haven't worked it out already - I like this film. The jokes and comic scenes are so good I could watch this movie on a continuous loop and still laugh out loud each time. Infact, I'm off to watch it again.

Top 5 Reasons for Watching Duck Soup

[5] Chicolini's trial
As good an example of the Marx Brothers wordplay genius as you'll find outside the 'Why a duck?' sequence in their debut The Cocoanuts. An entire coutroom seem as baffled as the rest of us in witnessing Groucho and Chico banter and even enjoy "a nice, cool glass eliminate".

[4] Margaret Dumont
A masterclass of how to play the straight man from the Marx Brothers regular cohort. Margaret Dumont is always outstanding when in the prescence of Groucho and the tremendous amount of respect between the two is a delight to witness in the midst of Groucho's non-stop insults!

[3] The lemonade vendor scene
Comedy gold. Such an amazing combination of physical comedy, slapstick and choreography while still completely surreal throughout - this is yet another Marx Magic Moment. My own daughters (aged just 6 and 8 currently) love it to bits and even try and re-enact the sequence at home!

[2] Marx genius
Perhaps more than any of the other Marx movies, Duck Soup completely captures the surreal genius of the madcap trio (and Zeppo) proving just how many decades ahead of the game they were. If you're not sure what the Marx brothers is all about try a portion of Duck Soup and remember - these guys were clowning around like this in 1933.

[1] The mirror sequence
Yes, it had been done before (by Charlie Chaplin and Max Linder) and yes it's been done several times since. But never has it been performed anywhere near the greatness of this scene. It's not only a great mirror trick but it even satirizes itself half way through and keeps on going until you have to lift yourself off the floor from laughing. You won't find a list of funniest movie moments without this classic few minutes of film.


Duck Soup quotes

Gloria Teasdale: As chairwoman of the reception committee, I extend the good wishes of every man, woman and child of Freedonia.
Rufus T. Firefly: Never mind that stuff. Take a card.
Gloria Teasdale: A card? What'll I do with a card?
Rufus T. Firefly: You can keep it. I've got fifty-one left.

Gloria Teasdale: I've sponsored your appointment because I feel you are the most able statesman in all Freedonia.
Rufus T. Firefly: Well, that covers a lot of ground. Say! You cover a lot of ground yourself. You'd better beat it. I hear they're gonna tear you down and put up an office building where you're standing. You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff. You know, you haven't stopped talking since I came here. You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.

Rufus T. Firefly: Not that I care, but where is your husband?
Gloria Teasdale: Why, he's dead.
Rufus T. Firefly: I bet he's just using that as an excuse.
Gloria Teasdale: I was with him to the very end.
Rufus T. Firefly: No wonder he passed away.
Gloria Teasdale: I held him in my arms and kissed him.
Rufus T. Firefly: Oh, I see, then it was murder. Will you marry me? Did he leave you any money? Answer the second question first.

Gloria Teasdale: I want to present to you Ambassador Trentino of Sylvania. Having him with us today is indeed a great pleasure.
Ambassador Trentino: Thank you, but I can't stay very long.
Rufus T. Firefly: That's even a greater pleasure. Now, how about lending this country twenty thousand dollars, you old skinflint?
Ambassador Trentino: Twenty thousand dollars is a lot of money. I'd have to take that up with my Minister of Finance.
Rufus T. Firefly: Well, in the meantime, could you let me have twelve dollars until payday?
Ambassador Trentino: Twelve dollars?
Rufus T. Firefly: Don't be scared. You'll get it back. I'll give you my personal note for ninety days. If it isn't paid by then, you can keep the note.

Rufus T. Firefly: Don't look now, but there's one man too many in this room. And I think it's you.

Rufus T. Firefly: I could dance with you till the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows till you come home.

Rufus T. Firefly: Take a letter.
Lt. Bob Roland: Who to?
Rufus T. Firefly: To my dentist, Uh - "Dear dentist, enclosed you'll find cheque for five hundred dollars. Yours very truly". Send that off immediately.
Lt. Bob Roland: I'll, uh, I'll have to enclose the cheque first.
Rufus T. Firefly: You do and I'll fire you.

Ambassador Trentino: Oh! Now, Chicolini, I want a full detailed report of your investigation.
Chicolini: All right, I tell you. Monday we watch a Firefly's house, but he no come out. He wasn't home. Tuesday we go to the ball game, but he fool us. He no show up. Wednesday he go to the ball game, and we fool him. We no show up. Thursday was a double header. Nobody show up. Friday it rained all day. There was no ball game, so we stayed home and we listened to it on a the radio.
Ambassador Trentino: Then you didn't shadow Firefly?
Chicolini: Oh, sure we shadow Firefly. We shadow him all day.
Ambassador Trentino: But what day was that?
Chicolini: Shadowday. Ha ha ha. That's a some joke, eh, Boss?

Rufus T. Firefly: A four year old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four year old child. I can't make head or tail out of it.

Rufus T. Firefly: And now, members of the Cabinet, we'll take up old business.
Minister of Commerce: I wish to discuss the tariff.
Rufus T. Firefly: Sit down, that's new business. No old business? Very well - then we'll take up new business.
Minister of Commerce: Now, about that tariff.
Rufus T. Firefly: Too late. That's old business already. Sit down.

Minister of Labour: The department of Labour wishes to report that the workers of Freedonia are demanding shorter hours.
Rufus T. Firefly: Very well, we'll give them shorter hours. We'll start by cutting their lunch hour to twenty minutes.

Chicolini: Peanuts to you.

Rufus T. Firefly: How would you like a job in the mint?
Chicolini: Mint? No, no, I no like a mint. Uh - what other flavour you got?

Rufus T. Firefly: Now listen here. I've got a swell job for you, but first I'll have to ask you a couple of important questions. Now, what is it that has four pair of pants, lives in Philadelphia and it never rains but it pours?
Chicolini: That's a good one. I give you three guesses.
Rufus T. Firefly: Now, let me see. Has four pair of pants, lives in Philadelphia. Is it male or female?
Chicolini: No, I don't think so.
Rufus T. Firefly: Is he dead?
Chicolini: Who?
Rufus T. Firefly: I don't know. I give up.
Chicolini: I give up too. Now, I ask you another one. What is it got big black a moustache, smokes a big black cigar, and is a big pain in the neck?
Rufus T. Firefly: Now, don't tell me. Has a big black moustache, smokes a big black cigar and is a big pain in the...
Chicolini: Uh.
Rufus T. Firefly: Does he wear glasses?
Chicolini: Atsa right. You guess it quick.
Rufus T. Firefly: Just for that, you don't get the job I was gonna give you.
Chicolini: What job?
Rufus T. Firefly: Secretary of War.
Chicolini: All right, I take it.
Rufus T. Firefly: Sold.

Ambassador Trentino: I've said enough. I'm a man of few words.
Rufus T. Firefly: I'm a man of one word: scram!

Rufus T. Firefly: Married. I can see you right now in the kitchen, bending over a hot stove. But I can't see the stove.

Ambassador Trentino: I am willing to do anything to prevent this war.
Rufus T. Firefly: It's too late. I've already paid a month's rent on the battlefield.

Gloria Teasdale: I thought you left.
Chicolini: Oh no. I don't leave.
Gloria Teasdale: But I saw you with my own eyes.
Chicolini: Well, who you gonna believe, me or your own eyes?

Prosecutor: Chicolini, you're charged with high treason. And if found guilty, you'll be shot.
Chicolini: I object.
Prosecutor: You object. On what grounds?
Chicolini: I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Rufus T. Firefly: Objection sustained.
Prosecutor: Your Excellency? You sustained the objection?
Rufus T. Firefly: Sure. I couldn't think of anything else to say either. Why don't you object?
Prosecutor: Chicolini, when were you born?
Chicolini: I don't remember. I was just a little baby.

Rufus T. Firefly: Gentlemen, Chicolini here may talk like an idiot and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot. I implore you, send him back to his father and brothers who are waiting for him with open arms in the penitentiary. I suggest that we give him ten years in Leavenworth or eleven years in Twelveworth.

Finance Minister: Something must be done! War would mean a prohibitive increase in our taxes.
Chicolini: Hey, I got an uncle lives in Taxes.
Finance Minister: No, I'm talking about taxes, money, dollars.
Chicolini: Dollars! There's a where my uncle lives! Dollars, Taxes!

Rufus T. Firefly: Awfully decent of you to drop in today. Do you realise our army is facing disastrous defeat? What do you intend to do about it?
Chicolini: I've done it already.
Rufus T. Firefly: You've done what?
Chicolini: I've changed to the other side.
Rufus T. Firefly: So you're on the other side, eh? Well, what are you doing over here?
Chicolini: Well, the food is better over here.

Rufus T. Firefly: Remember, you're fighting for this woman's honour, which is probably more than she ever did.



Production company: Paramount Pictures