"What can I do to you - for you?"

Journalist Irwin Fletcher (Fletch) is approached on the beach by businessman Alan Stanwyk said to be dying of cancer. Fletch is offered $50,000 to shoot Stanwyk in order for his family to receive the insurance money. But Fletch decides to investigate further and uncovers a story that while worthy of the front page, is likely to result in Fletch being killed himself...

"My name is Irwin Fletcher. I'm an investigative reporter for a Los Angeles paper. You've probably read my stuff under the by-line of Jane Doe. What the hey - it's better than Irwin. The last three weeks I've been loitering around the beach trying to pass for an amiable minor-league junkie. I don't nod out or drool - it's too obvious. Act like you don't give a crap and you fit right in.

In case you haven't guessed yet there's been a lot of drug traffic on the beach. And I'm not talking about Robitussin and No-doze. I'm talking about the hard stuff and a lot of it. I've been trying to find out who's behind it. It hasn't been easy. I don't shower much."


skyjude review
Simply the funniest comedy movie I've had the pleasure to watch. An hour and a half of non-stop quoteable lines performed in exquisite fashion by Chevy Chase. For legions of fans across the World quoting lines from Fletch is a daily occurence - it's become part of their vocabulary. The jokes just keep on coming and it will take several viewings to catch all of Chevy's superb ad-libbed lines. But if several viewings it must be then make it so - I'm off to watch it again...

Top 5 Reasons for Watching Fletch

[5] 80's Soundtrack
As if everything else in this movie didn't suggest it already, the soundtrack is confirmation of this movie's 80's setting. It's goes full circle from being so naff it's good, that it actually becomes good and naff simultaneously. Or something. Either way you'll be humming the tunes for days after watching - "Fletch - Get outta town!"

[4] Richard Libertini
Given the not overly huge role of Fletch's boss, the genius that is Richard Libertini brings the character to life in hysterical fashion. His concern at the source of Fletch's story being a 'grey' area and Fletch's insistence he needs to go to Utah, draw some of the funniest expressions of the movie.

[3] Fletch at the airport
There are a million great comic moments in this film but Fletch at the Pan-Am desk (see quotes below for full script) is my absoloute favourite. Again in disguise and again talking himself into difficulty he just spurts out the most amazing gibberish all the time failing to upset the po-faced clerk.

[2] The one-liners
Chevy gets most of them but the one-liners in this are, without question, the greatest in any comedy ever. My family and friends will be testament to the fact that not a single day goes by without me spurting one of them out. Indeed, most of them have now caught the bug too - altogether now - "Jesus H. Christ on a popsicle stick!"

[1] Chevy Chase
Fans of the novel may not like how Chevy took the role of Fletch on and made it his own but Chevy fans love it. He essentially used the script as a guideline to showpiece his sublime comic talent. Mixing the physical comedy he became famous for with some of the most wonderful one-liners in movie history he is Fletch and he is the film. With a huge gap since his last good movie it's easy to forget now just how good Chevy was in his prime - in the 80's he was simply the funniest guy on the planet. The comedy actors of today just don't compare with a comic genius such as Chevy in Fletch mode.


Fletch quotes

Fletch: Are you on a scavenger hunt or did I just forget to pay my dinner cheque?

Fletch: Does this proposition entail my dressing up as Little Bo Peep?

Fletch: For an extra grand I'll let you take me out to dinner.

Fletch: Oh, you've remodelled the garage. Must have cost you hundreds.

Alan Stanwyk: You'll be wearing rubber gloves. Do you own rubber gloves?
Fletch: I rent them. I have a lease with an option to buy.

Fletch: Well there we're in kind of a grey area.
Frank Walker: Okay, how grey?
Fletch: Charcoal.

Dr. Dolan: Isn't there a children's book about an elephant called Babar?
Fletch: I don't know. I don't have any.
Dr. Dolan: No children?
Fletch: No elephant books.

Fletch: Thankyou Doc. Ever served time?

Fletch: Aaarrrggghhh! Using the whole fist Doc?

Dr. Dolan: Well, I don't find anything wrong with you.
Fletch: Well, I'm sure it's not for a lack of looking.

Fletch: Where am I?
Nurse: You're in the records room. Can I get you something?
Fletch: Do you have The Beatles White Album? Never mind just get me a glass of hot fat and bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia while you're out there.

Waiter: Excuse me Senor, are you a member of the club?
Fletch: No I'm not. I'm with the Underhills.
Waiter: They are left Senor.
Fletch: That's alright they'll be back. He went out for his urinalysis.
Waiter: Would you like some drinks Senor while you wait? I will put it on the Underhill's bill.
Fletch: Yes, very good. I'll have a Bloody Mary and a steak sandwich and a steak sandwich please.

Fletch: Somebody's bucking for a promotion. It's probably that pederast Hanrahan.

Stanton Boyd: Jesus H. Christ on a popsicle stick!

Madeline: I'm sorry - who are you again?
Fletch: I'm Frieda's boss.
Madeline: Who's Frieda?
Fletch: My secretary.

Fletch: If you're wearing rubbers leave them outside.

Fletch: Frank, I need to go to Utah.
Frank Walker: Utah?
Fletch: Yeah Utah. It's wedged in between Wyoming, Nevada. You've seen pictures.

Fletch: Come on Frank, say yes. I'll buy you some new deodorant.

Fletch: Look - defenceless babies!

Cop: Got a gun creep?
Fletch: Shamu's got one. Borrow his.

Fletch: You fellas wanna read me my rights?
Cop: You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to have your face kicked in by me. You have the right to have your balls stamped on by him.
Fletch: I'll waive my rights.

Police desk clerk: You'll like Chief Karlin. He's a nice man.
Fletch: Yeah I hear he's mellowed out a lot since he came out of the closet.

Chief Karlin: So, what's your name?
Fletch: Fletch.
Chief Karlin: Full name?
Fletch: Fletch F. Fletch.
Chief Karlin: I see. And what do you do for a living Mr. Fletch?
Fletch: I'm a shepherd.
Chief Karlin: Officers would you excuse us for a moment?
Fletch: Yeah - why don't you guys go down to the gym and pump each other?
Chief Karlin: Why are you doing this Mr. Fletch?
Fletch: I like men. I like to be manhandled. I like you.

Fletch: You're serious?
Chief Karlin: Ask anybody.
Fletch: Can I ask anybody now? How about can I call my mum - tell her how much I love her?

Mechanic: You're supposed to have been here over an hour ago boy.
Fletch: Well, traffic was murder you know. One of those manure spreaders jack-knifed on the Santa Ana. God awful mess. You should see my shoes!

Fletch: Ah, that's a terrific wing. I love that shape.

Fletch: Ah, come on guys it's so simple! Maybe you need a refresher course - it's all ball-bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that fetzer valve with some Three-In-One oil and some gauze pads. And I'm gonna need about ten quarts of anti-freeze, preferably Prestone. No... no make that Quaker State.

Fletch: Can I borrow your towel for a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo.

Gail Stanwyk: Are you always this forward?
Fletch: Only with wet, married women.

Fletch: Well, I saved his life during the war.
Gail Stanwyk: You were in the war?
Fletch: No, he was. I got him out.

Pan-Am clerk: Mr Stanwyk, you are confirmed on Pan-Am flight 441 to Rio de Janiero tomorrow evening eleven PM first class.
Fletch: That's teriffic, thankyou.
Pan-Am clerk: You re-confirmed this morning.
Fletch: You bet I did. I'm a bearer for detail. I hope there's nobody sitting next to me. You see I always travel first class and I er, take both seats up. I'm in bridge-work, construction. These fold-outs take a tremendous amount of space up and I need the space.
Pan-Am clerk: I'm afraid there is someone sitting next to you.
Fletch: Oh for God darn, darn! Who is it? Mr Sininlinden?
Pan-Am clerk: No, the name's Cavanaugh.
Fletch: Cavanuagh. Ah, is that Maurice or Pierre?
Pan-Am clerk: Sally-Ann Cavanaugh.
Fletch: Sally-Ann? Well, teriffic.
Pan-Am clerk: Infact, you purchased the ticket for Miss Cavanaugh.
Fletch: Doesn't mean I want her sitting next to me does it?

Fletch: I'm afraid I'm gonna have to pull rank on you. I didn't want to have to do this. I'm with the mattress police. There are no tags on these mattresses.

Fletch: I love your body Larry.

Marvin Stanwyk: Boy, what in the hell's the matter with you?

Gail Stanwyk: She looks like a hooker. Look at her! Look at her! Could you love someone who looked like that?
Fletch: What are you talking about? Of course not. Five, ten minutes top maybe.

Fletch: Sally-Ann and Alan were married eight years ago. Never divorced making Alan a bigamist. Even in Utah.

Fletch: Curiously she said we had roughly the same build. From the waist up I imagine.

Fletch: If you shoot me you're liable to lose a lot of those humanitarian awards.

Fletch: The coroner had certified Stanwyk dead. Or extremely sleepy.



Production company: Universal Pictures